And the Walls Came Tumbling Down

Alpenhorns by b52_Tresa on Pixabay

Lena stumbled out of her back door, coffee in hand and mayhem on her mind. Her neighbor Owen stood just on the other side of the fence between their yards, smiling more smugly than any human should have to endure, especially at 10:30 AM. The new cabin stood finished behind him, fragrant tar roof baking in the sun, still too close. Still there. Despite everything.

“It’s a beauty, huh”, he asked cheerfully.

“Look Owen,” she said with measured calmness. “We’ve been over this. I’ve shown you the plat map. The county assessor’s office verified it right in front of you. Your cabin is too close to the property line. It is an issue. I need it gone.”

Owen shrugged regally. “Whatever. It’s built. Nothing you can do about it now..”

Lena shook her head. “Owen, Last time. Take it down.”

“No.” Owen’s voice was simultaneously icy and oily.

“Fine”, Lena said. “Ever heard of Jericho?”

She whistled sharply and a dozen large men wearing lederhosen and Tyrolean hats strode around the corner of her garage. Each of them carried long curved horns, which they set in front of them, arrayed in a rough semi-circle with the focal point as Owen’s cabin. They stood, mouthpieces almost to their lips, and looked to Lena.

He smirked.

That did it. She nodded to the men, who inhaled deeply then blew a single, mighty, blasting note on their alpenhorns.

Part of Lena’s fence, two willow trees, and Owen’s doomed cabin blew into splinters.

Not really sure where this story came from. I like my neighbors and we have no issues. Though there was this guy who lived next to us when I was a kid. What a jerk he was. He drilled a well in his backyard so he could keep his lawn nice and green despite water restrictions in the summer. See, wells in our neighborhood were illegal. If you’re on county water, you need to leave the well water for folks in the county who couldn’t get water and sewer service. Didn’t matter to him. He even built a big shed around the well and the pump.

Okay, maybe I do know where this story came from after all!

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(Photo Credit: b52_Tresa on Pixabay)